Splash No. 115 - Training Arc
Training Arc
It drives me a bit crazy that this new life we’re living hasn’t even begun to end. That this lifestyle isn’t just something we have to deal with for a little while, but a lifestyle we need to adapt to for some time. In order to cope, I decided that I would divide the future into phases. Before we reach the normalcy phase, where some aspects of my old life return, I needed some way to label the unspecified length of time where I would continue living the way that I was living.
Lately, I’ve been reading a book called My Year of Rest and Relaxation where the narrator decides to sleep for an entire year, hoping to awaken as a new, perfect person. Unfortunately, I do have a full-time job, so I can’t do that (yet). However, I’ve also been watching a good amount of action anime, which are often include “training arcs,” where characters spend weeks or months focusing on getting stronger in preparation for some oncoming battle, usually in Rocky-style montages. I don’t have an upcoming battle, but I look forward to the days where I choose to different life from what I had before the quarantine. I no longer take for granted the beauties of eating dinner out with my friends or just vegetating in a coffee shop in the middle of the day. There are moments that I dream of leisurely strolling through a thrift shop or an overpriced specialty store. With this time that I’ll be spending at home, I’ve decided to christen this period of my life as my training arc. In the next 6-9(-12-15 months), I want to become better.
There are a variety of concrete ways that I want to improve: I want to eat healthier, lose some weight, get stronger, and just generally be more energetic. I want to get some meaningful design work done for my job, become a better writer, and maybe try to have something published. And most of all, I want to move closer to finding peace.
At some point in my life, I decided that my role in the world didn’t matter. That as an individual, my mark on the world would be meager at best, that I would be better off just focusing on myself and those close to me. At the same time, I was raised on the morals of Hinduism, that each person was brought to the planet with a specific purpose in mind, their dharma. For all beings, that dharma includes being truthful, living with love, acting with compassion and living a life of faith. I’m starting to realize that my individualistic ideas are irreconcilable with my Hindu beliefs. To focus on those close to me, I would have to ignore the very real struggles that afflict everyone. And for me to truly be a person I would be proud of being, I would have to think bigger.
With everything that is happening in America today, I have been thinking bigger. But so far, it has made me angry rather than peaceful. I’m angry that a man was shot 7 times in the back and paralyzed in front of his children simply for ignoring the orders of an institution that continues to prove its illegitimacy. I’m angry that a 17-year-old kid is praised by the right for murdering two protesters that sought to fought for what’s right. I’m angry that it’s a controversial opinion that a human life matters and that the state shouldn’t be the one to decide whether someone lives or dies. And though anger feels like the furthest thing from peace, I feel confident that following this anger is the way to find peace. That fighting for what’s right is the only way to find peace.
I’ve been focused on writing lately. I’ve been trying to find writing groups with people who can help guide me. I’ve discovered new ways of expression and ideas that I never even thought of expressing. But most importantly, I recently attended a workshop which presented the quote, “There are no new ideas. There are only new ways of making them felt.”
There are a lot of things that I want to do during my training arc, but the most important for me is to learn as much as possible on how we can create a better world and learn how to make them felt like never before. I want to experience doing everything possible to fight oppressive systems and document them in a way that inspires action. I want to train to become someone who can at once be unified in my beliefs, my words and my deeds.
The fight against systemic racism continues. With each day, we move closer to a more equitable world. Reminders:
Ways you can help Find your Local SURJ Chapter
Anti-racism resources
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Look forward,
Nikhil