The End of a Teen
Tomorrow, I turn 20 years old and I want to be like Lorde and write a letter about the end of my teenage years. I have trouble believing that the most formative time period in my life is coming to an end. I doubt that a 13-year-old me would have been able to imagine the person I’ve become. I’m still shy sometimes and I still make the same Spongebob references as I did when I first became a teen, but not much else remains.
I think the greatest lesson that I’ve learned is that anything can change. I thought I believed this on an abstract level at first, but I didn’t really internalize it until I was introduced to Stoicism. Every day, minute, second, millisecond introduces change into your life and one of the main ideas behind stoicism is that even if you can’t control those changes, you still have control over how you react.
For the longest time, I struggled a lot with envy. I would often well up with envy when I saw someone doing something interesting. I often still do, but I have began to be more mindful about how I think about the success of others. Intellectually, I spent a lot of time listening to interviews and reading autobiographies of people I consider highly successful. Over time, I’ve learned to focus on the process - about what goes into the success of these people. They don’t just happen because that person has always been that eloquent, that skilled, that knowledgable, but from years of practice, help from peers and a million other factors. So when I encounter Joe Shmoe creating fantastic videos about the beauty of the mundane, I try to think about how far he had to go to build up those technical and creative skills to get there. And second, I think to ask him how I can get there?
If anything can change, and I can control my reactions to those changes, why shouldn’t my reaction be to change myself? For most of my life, I was afraid to try things, maybe because I thought I would fail, or the result would be bad or I would look out of place. At this point, after establishing myself as a passable photographer and illustrator, I’ve gained enough self-confidence to try whatever I want and not care all that much. That’s why, after watching an amazing travel vlog, I decided to make one of my own out of old footage that I’ve been taking over the years. It was cool to try producing a different type of media, and I’m proud of my first attempt though I am aware I can do even better.
I’m not sure why everything I learn has to be related to something I’ve done or made, but I swear every version of this newsletter won’t just be me showing off. If anything, I hope that reading what I have to say may help you to create something for yourself (and share it with me!).
To more revelations in the next phase of my life!
Drops of the Week
where I *drop* recommendations of cool things this week
The Most Beautiful Visual Essay
“Home is a Cup of Tea” (you need to read this, so open it in a new tab right now) - I think you can guess what it’s about. It got me thinking about what I think of as home. As someone who associates chai with home and coffee with the life I’m trying to build away from home, it really struck a chord with me.
Album
“Yesterday’s Gone” by Loyle Carner - This may be one of my favorite albums of the year. Loyle’s smooth English-accented voice blends beautifully with mellow beats and emotional hooks. Definitely worth checking out.
Web Experiment?
Computerized Forms - I’m not sure how to categorize this - it’s a cool project to have poster designs move to music. I’m always excited about the intersection of art and tech, so check it out!
Thanks so much for reading! If you have any comments/concerns or fan/hate mail for me, you know how to reach me (links below).
Love,
Nikhil